Things that made me hate life less.

We hate our lives, yeah... I hate my life even until now but I know that I have to hold on and be happy in the meantime but sometimes, it's just hard to find that something that will make life more bearable but at least I manage to find this things and people.
1. April Boy's song with his son JC. The song has a message where in he does not want to fall in love in the mean time because of the pain that he has experience. During my depressed periods, this song, though sad, actually makes me laugh after singing it at the top of my lungs. It kinds of sum up everything that I felt.
2. A desperate girl for love. I don't want to mention her name but her story of relationship or should I say pseudorelationship are just really sad that being single makes me thankful. She ends up looking for romantic potentials in the office and they end up not liking her although she is pa-sweet and whatever. I even said to one of my friends that for some reason, she's not ugly, there's just something in her that will never make me woo her if I were a guy and guess what, two more guys said it.
3. This another really sad girl. She had the worst in life and I just don't want to comment or discuss her. She is the most pathetic person that I've met. Her career and personal life is a mess. I don't want to go into details because people will easily know her, anyway, she is the one who brought it to herself so whatever. Every time I see her, I am glad to wake up as me and the best part of it, she is not skinny!
4. The accent of Xiao Chen. She tries to speak English and it's just funny. I am not saying that she's silly or what, she's just so adorable and it brightens up my day.
5. Frozen yogurt with blueberry. I don't know but it has a weird effect on me.
6. Breakfast at Seattles. I just like sitting at the rattan chairs with cushions before going to the gym.
7. Work. I tend to forget how my personal life sucks and I just focus on the metrics that I have to maintain.
8. Luckies. It makes me feel that I'm lucky and as I usually say it... yosi is happiness.

Summer na naman...

I have to make plans na. Gusto kong magisang pumunta somewhere. Ok lang ang beach basta out of town. Gusto kong pumuntang tagaytay siguro or whatever. Hehe. Self searching ba. Nauso na naman ang term na to. Naeenjoy ko kasi ang ganitong buhay na ginagawa ko lang ang gusto kong gawin. Walang nagrerestrain s akin. Masaya pa ako na i lost the wanting the approval of my parents. Gusto ko lang ng fine relationship with them, if they make fun of my job or something, sila na basta ako masya na ako sa ginagawa ko. At the end of april, me 4 days akong off, im planning n magpaspa, magworkout ng bongga, explore a new locale, matulog the whole day. Hehe.

Things na babaguhin ko for this March

Can I trust you with my heart?... Adobo?

Lately, I realized that I only eat two types of food. One is adobo and the other is spaghetti with Chicken. I know I have to change my diet style. Anyway, my third type pa pala ako ng kinakain, yun ay hotdog, hehe. Ayun, for the past week, ganito ang kain ko. I swear/promise na hindi na ganito ang magiging eating habits ko for the next 8 days. Magbabaon na ako starting Sunday shift. Kakain ako lagi na lang sa bahay para makatipid, lalo pa ngayon na kelangan ko ngang magtipid! Whoa! So kung me babaguhin ako for this month, yun ay ang dadamihan ko ang frequency ng paghuhugas ko ng mukha at I will eat healthier food choices. Bukod pa diyan,I'm going to make sure na magfofocus ako sa aking art at sa aking independency. Tanggap ko ng ako ang magiging cool aunt ng mga future babies ng aking mga friends/family. Ako yung aunt na wala ng family and kids pero me cool na kotse at kung saan saan napupunta at kung anu-ano ang hobbies and activities. Gosh, if ever magkajowa ulet ako baka matawa ako sa blog kong to pero sa future boyfriend ko, sinasabi ko na ayoko ng babies, pero kung 28 na ako, irerethink ko yung life ko, so check on me after N years, okies??? So kung me alam kayong kung sino who showcases amateur painters, please give me a call or leave a message and I'll get back to you. You can email me at mimitamaldita@gmail.com. 

Done with the pain and it's crunch time

Lately, all my blog has talked about is pain and depression. Sometimes, we'll just have to go with the emotions and at some point and time, we have to eventually move on. We have to do the best that we can and everything that we needed to do just for the sake of our own sanity. Was I crazy? Not exactly but I have been depressed and I have been doing everything that I can not to show or not to end up messing with my life big time. I have been sick for two weeks and being sick just made me sadder. I ended up not going to the gym and not eating and losing passion for everything that I loved. I have decided to stand up again and continue with catching up with all the things that I needed to do. I have returned to the gym, started my painting project again and listening to music as my outlet. I decided not to take life very seriously. I am somehow inspired by Holly Holiday. She is just so cool and free. I wanted to feel and live that way, she says that she lives a life with no consequence, I don't really think that way, I think, she just don't take life all that serious, she just does what she needs to do and have fun with life and that's what I am going to do. I know I have a lot of issues about my life, about different aspects in my life but I don't want to deal with them right now. I will just let it hang there, it will always be there anyway.... and hopefully, things will just be right and perfect again and if it doesn't, well, shit happens, we usually have a bad day and I'll just smile and pray that I will have the strength, the sanity, the friends and alcohol and of course, my luckies to stick with me through the rough times. peace out!

Batman

Comic freak...I never really followed the Batman story although all the comic heroes, he is my favorite and if a real Batman is alive, I would marry that guy. Seriously, he is strong, rich and smart, and do you know, Batman can even sing???? Hahaha, mataas talaga ang standard ko, won't settle with someone like Superman, faster than a speeding bullet, mamaya kung san pa siya mabilis, if you know what i mean, hahahaha, or with Scott Summers, ampota, dinaig pa si Randy Santiago sa pagtatago sa shades niya and seriously beyond that, what is Scott Summers good for and he has been cheating with Jean Grey din naman, so whatever. Or with Spiderman, mamaya, accidentally pa niya akong mapatay just like what he did with his blond girlfriend that I never liked so I don't care, saka masyadong madrama buhay ni Spiderman na never din naging sila ni Mary

 Jane, yeah, they were married but something happened, basta super tragic talaga. 

Whatever, at least normal pati si Batman, hindi siya mutant or alien or nakagat ng radioactive insect and that's what amazes me about him, he may not have super powers but he can be a hero. I know it's because he has money and their company has something to do with technology stuff so he has a lot of access but come on, sa dami ng bilyonaryo sa mundo natin ngayon, sino ang nagawa ng ganyan na nalabas ka sa gabi ng nakacostume natulong. Actually me nagawa niyan sa ngayon sa states eh, as in with the costume and all, helping people from the littlest of things hanggang sa pagcall out ng mga drug dealers and they are not even billionaires so ang point ko, the best talaga si Batman. Ang hindi ko lang gusto sa kanya eh yung he won't let go of his stupid cape. I mean, he never settled down, he only had a love child with some girl and in earth-two, he had Helena

 Wayne with Selina Kyle but guys, that's earth two. He lived in Wayne Manor but in the Silver Ages, he  had to move to a penthouse atop the Wayne Foundation. See, he is also charitable, besides the Wayne Industries, he does his charity work through Wayne Foundation; other things to note about Batman, he had sidekicks (Robin and Batgirl) and a butler who also assisted him with his escapades. Alfred Pennyworth, the English butler who raised Bruce, (though it was also said that Philip Wayne,his uncle raised him after his parents' death) and assisted him at the time that he has still no Robin and Lucius Fox who helps Bruce with his company and Batman with his suit and gadget are notable characters too. I have seen a lot of version of Batman adventures sa cartoons growing up pero talagang mapapansin mo na he's so smart like he never goes out there without a Plan B, plan C and he's just super smart. Meron akong isang episode na napanood, forgot which version that was, sa Cartoon Network ko napanood, about Mr. Freeze, he knew that after 1000 years, Mr. Freeze would come back and alam din niyang, kahit anong galing at yaman niya, wala na siyang magagawa about it but he was still able to come up with a plan in order for him to protect Gotham sa pagbabalik ni Mr. Freeze. After Batman RIP, Bruce's returns and decided that he will have Batman to do its cause globally and therefore, Batman Inc begins... hehe. 

For those who doesn't know, the origins of Batman, it all begun when Joe Chill killed his parents after watching the movie. It never made sense to me,they are socialites,in Gossip Girl, those kids always just hail a cab or they have a ride or something but I don't understand why the family have to be in some kind of an alley, grrrr. Anyway, if it weren't for the death of Thomas and Martha Wayne, no Batman. Bruce chose the bat costume because he wants to strike fear and terror in the hearts of the criminals or something to that effect. Anyways, we know the story of how he fights the crime in Gotham and against Joker, Two-face, Riddle, Penguin, others so let's discuss other things that most people would not know about Batman. First, in the Golden Age, he and Superman become honorary members of Justice Society of America which includes, 

Hawkman, Flash, Green Lantern and others. Haha. In Silver Age, the concept of Earth-Two was introduced, he and Superman worked together, founded the Justice League, we met Joker and Ra's al Ghul, a terrorist. Dick Grayson becomes Nightwing. Batman also founded Outsiders, these are also group of Superheroes that "would not normally fit the norms of superhero community". I don't know what that means, I was disinterested with that group knowing that their relationship with batman was strained and he eventually left them on their own. Batman had sidekicks; Dick Grayson, Jason Todd and Tim Drake, fourth Robin is a girl named Stephanie Brown, Tim Drake's girlfriend and the fifth Robin, Damian Wayne, the love child with some girl. As for the Batgirl, Kathy Kane was Batwoman and her niece was the first Batgirl and then Barbara Gordon, Helena Bertenelli, who also became the Huntress and is usually confused with Helena Wayne because they were both Huntress. Barbara and Helena are members of Birds of Prey.Cassandra cain was the next to become Batgirl and after Batman's apparent death, Stephanie Brown becomes Batgirl.  

Kahit naman ganyan si Batman, marami naman siyang love interest. In the beginning of Batman strips, he was engaged with Julie Madison, a socialite but they split up after Batman realized that he wanted more out of his life, he has to do things and not just be a playboy millionaire/billionaire. Linda Page, a woman that he dated after Julie. Next is Vicki Vale, she works for the Gotham Gazette and just reports what Batman does, pretty much like what Lois Lane does for Superman. I know there's this Batman in Earth-two, a parallel universe, where he married Selina Kyle a.k.a the Catwoman and they had Helena Wayne, a.k.a, the Huntress as their kid. I like this universe because one, I like Selina for Bruce and two, it seems like a happy ending although Selina and Bruce ended up dying, at least they lived a somewhat normal life. Due to homoeroticism accusation 

between Batman and Robin, they created a love interest for Batman, Kathy Kane who is the first Batwoman and her niece, Bette Kane is the first Batgirl. Talia Al-gul, the mother of Damian Wayne, was the daughter of a villain. Obviously, Batman has a thing for the bad girls, besides dating Catwoman, he and Poison Ivy had a sexual tension, and he and Harley Quinn just had something and was involved with Nocturna/Natalia Knight who became Jason Todd's surrogate mother. He also dated normal girls after, Silver St. Cloud, a socialite, deduced that she was dating Batman decided to split up with him, Rachel Caspian, the girl who Bruce was willing to give up his crime-fighting days for. There's actually a long list of girls, you can always look them up. :)

Depression and being positive

Sometimes, we just have to admit defeat and succumb to the pain that defeat brings upon us and that's exactly what happened to me this past week. Defeat is just a feeling that none of us wants to feel but at one point in our lives, we just have to accept it because we all experience defeat. For some reason, I felt that I was defeated by many things last week... by things that I do not and cannot control. Of all things, I just hate things that I cannot control because I cannot do something about it. One day, I just felt that there's nothing that I can do and I begun assessing my life and blaming it to random events in my life until I just felt tired and unhappy. I had to do a lot of projects but I just end up not being excited about anything. I was not even excited to do shopping and I end up eating ice cream for two straight days. I went to the gym just to ran for twenty minutes. I felt that endorphines are not and will no longer be reproduced again even if I ran for 2 hours. I felt that I lost my passion to do things. I don't even enjoy watching tv. I just watched tv so that the silence won't deafen me. I would even dine alone in our house or not eating at all. I started moving on when I decided to go out with my friends even if I lost the energy to do so. After letting all my feelings out, I just realized that despite things being uncontrollable, there is always something that I can do to make things better for me. I may have done something crazy but here's what I know, I will not regret that, I still respect myself, although I lost 5% and I feel that I am again in control of something again. I am just trying to see the positive  in things. I am now starting to work on my painting again and writing on my blog and fixing my sched. For the next few days, there are a lot of catching up to do so there will be no OT's, post-shift shopping and hanging out at the mall. I have to recalibrate my goals and focus and just keep on seeing the positive and things will be different for me.